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What exactly is the level of our commitment to each other?” For Greg and Gina, this conversation occurred at the four month point in their relationship.Discussing how you and your partner view your relationship is a natural and necessary part of moving forward—or deciding not to.Sensitivity, understanding, and proper timing will make the conversation positive and productive.Despite his determination to take things slow and easy, he began to envision a long, blissful future together.And although he was sure about his own ardent feelings for Gina, he wasn’t quite sure she felt as strongly in return.They had started dating casually with no expectations about what might develop.But it wasn’t long before Greg fell head over heels in love with the vivacious and fun-loving woman.

It happens in nearly every dating relationship that lasts more than a few months: one or both partners initiate ‘The Talk’ to determine where exactly they’re at with each other.

Initiating the conversation in a crowded coffee shop, or at lunch when she has to go back to work, isn’t the best idea.

Don’t panic if the response isn’t exactly what you want.

This involves questions such as, “Are we ‘just friends’ or more than that?

Are we dating exclusively or is our relationship just casual?

It’s too vague to ask, “So what’s happening with this relationship? Chances are you want to know if you’ve crossed the boundary from “going out informally” to “dating exclusively.” If you feel ready to stop dating other people, that is an appropriate time to ask if your partner is ready to do the same. Probing each other’s feelings can be intense, so be careful about when and where you talk.

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