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The truth is, it's hard for all of us—men and women. It takes such tremendous courage to take that first step, to pick up the phone and call, or to walk in to a meeting. Ask the bartender what the girl is drinking and send that.When in doubt, a glass of something sparkling never hurt anyone.” “Wait for a response.Sadly there's no blanket for what does land, but still-confident-and-a-little-self-deprecating is usually a solid approach that can be really charming when used well.” Dan Gentile is a staff writer on Thrillist's National Food and Drink team.He'd like to thank all the women who contributed to this.At the beginning, I pretty much hung out with the gay men until I got to know everyone. Now I have so many friends and I am involved in service and love my SAA life. We are working hard to make it easier for women to join the fellowship and stay.

That person you're going to approach is just another human.If you're in a bar, flirting with a woman you're interested in doing sex stuff with, there are a million ways to screw up that encounter. To find out how not to totally blow it when talking to members of the fairer sex, we consulted a group of women who've collectively been romantically flailed at by thousands of hopeless men. “Don't send over a light beer, especially if I'm not drinking a light beer. You could accidentally attribute a poem about love to Rilke when it was clearly John Donne!And if they don't want to talk to you, it's okay, you will find someone who does.They're not a bad person or a bitch or an asshole just because they're not interested in having a conversation with you.” -- the guy just needs to figure it out before the tactics are deployed.The San Francisco Bay Area fellowship of Sex Addicts Anonymous has made it a priority to ensure that women who are interested in our fellowship feel welcome and safe in our meetings.

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